I owe you

Borrowing from one person to pay another is a way of life most of us are either currently in, or have experienced before. Is there a more fitting metaphor when it comes to living with a broken body? I know that I’m constantly navigating between which symptom or body part that I’m willing to trigger …

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Logs on the fire

Four days ago, I was diagnosed with cancer. I’m still in shock. I had no symptoms or indicators. During my annual gynecological visit, they did a pap. It isn’t a requirement or even recommended to do a pap for every visit, but my doctor is diligent because of my chronic conditions and family history. A …

Invisible proof

What you didn’t know, was that you would spend the rest of your life trying to convince people that you are broken. Even as you wrestle with the daily mindfuck that is surviving with invisible conditions, people need you to prove your pain and symptoms. Your word isn’t enough. Descriptions of any detail will never …

Eddie would go

I had the blessing of a childhood tightly intertwined with nature. Instead of days spent with a television babysitter or smartphone appendage, I was nearly always outdoors. Rain, shine, or storm I was outside with only my imagination, friends, and ingenuity.  The reason I’m highlighting my relationship with growing up in a nature-filled life, is …

Lady like me

The complexities of being a biological female dealing with chronic pain and illness are innumerable. This isn’t to say that other gender identities don’t struggle with similar issues. Everyone’s struggle is real. There are no flat roads in any of our health journeys. These are just some of the particular areas where women face constant …

Keep up!

It is one of the toughest times of the year for many people… the holidays. Throw a little 2020 chaos into the mix. Add a dash of pandemic. Twist in economic collapse. There’s nothing peaceful and easy about this ending. Currently, I live in America. This is the season (pretty much October through January) of …

Failed fluffy friend

I’m an animal person. I’ve been around pets and wild animals for most of my life. I know how to care for and interact with them. It’s all very natural for me. That being said, I haven’t had my own critter for a very long time. With a busy life, moving around, and travelling frequently, …

All over again

There isn’t much I could write about the general moving experience that hasn’t already been said. Most of us will move dwellings at lease once in our lives. Everyone knows it’s a hassle. I… well it’s hard to keep count… I have moved over 30 times. I’ve moved countries, states, cities, towns, villages, houses, apartments, …

Welcome to the bumpiest road

I’m not one of the lifers. My chronic conditions took over less than a decade ago. While I had experienced some symptoms earlier, my overwhelming and life-altering issues only developed in my late twenties. Of course, any amount of time with severe pain and symptoms feels like an eternity. Looking back to days of physical …

More than tired

Tiredness and fatigue are not the same things. There is a general perception that being fatigued means the same thing as being tired. When in fact, the two words describe very different experiences.  Tiredness hits like a wave that you ride. You go from active and energized to a slowly building exhaustion that crests with …